I did a slideshow, as usual. I added the song "See You
Again" from the final Fast and Furious movie, the Paul Walker tribute, and
my class just lost it. Every single person was crying. Except for Ahmed. But
his nickname is angry Ahmed, so there you go. Then I read my class letter. Of
course I cried the whole time.
I wanted to end the day a little bit more
positive so I decided to end with our favorite game: Silent Ball. A student
named Shucayb was a huge fan of Silent Ball but whenever he was the judge he
became an absolute tyrant. Funny, but overzealous and drunk on power when he
called students out. I picked his stick to be the final judge and as soon as I
did, I knew Silent Ball would not end well. But, fair is fair and he was the
judge.
Everyone set up in their bubble spaces and
I waited with dread for Shucayb to make the first rule. It was this: when you
throw the ball you have to shake the person's hand. What? That was the last
thing I expected. Here I was thinking he'd say you only have 3 seconds and you
have to stand on one foot and catch with one hand. Something difficult like
always. For sake of time, I added that after you catch it you have to line up.
So, the game began. Each student threw to
someone random, not just a friend. It was silent and still and sad, but sweet
at the same time. One last game of a silent ball, shaking the hand of someone
in class, one last time. I watched with tears in my eyes as each student, one
by one, shook a hand, lined up, and just watched respectfully until everyone
was finished. It was so hard to describe the feeling in the room, but the best
word I can think of is semi-sweet melancholy. I was so proud of Shucayb. I
couldn't have thought up a better way to end the year.
We walked out the door. I gave each student
one last high five. Many of them turned into a hug. Even Anthony and Kendal
gave me hugs. Even Ahmed. Every one of them. They walked to their buses or out
to parent pick up. I waited at the front of the school to wave goodbye to the
buses with the rest of the teachers. Recorded some of them. Caught one last
glimpse of my fourth graders.
The other teachers saw me sobbing, as they
expected. But some of them asked, "Still? After all this time?" and I
responded, "Always."
